Doula tips for labor
While we can’t prepare for or predict a lot of what happens during labor, a bit of planning ahead can go a long way to calm nerves and add comfort to the experience. Doulas have a unique insight into how to prepare and are valuable fountains of wisdom because of the number of different birth scenarios they are been a part of and the number of parents they connect with about what works for them. This month we asked a handful of doulas for their tips for labor on everything from mentally prepping ahead of time to designing birth preferences. We loved what they had to share and hope that it helps you as you navigate all of the options available to you right now.
Baby Caravan Doula tips for labor
What’s something many people don’t think about preparing?
“Preparing for postpartum for themselves. Most registries I see are filled with baby tech and cute outfits — all of that is good but it will not make you a healthy meal after a long day with a cluster feeding newborn or help you care for a healing body. Friends and family will be more than happy to send sitz bath herbs, gift cards to postpartum body workers, and meals through MealTrain.com — you just need to ask!” Alexandra Blanchard, Moon Child Doula
“Make your birth playlists available offline. Bring a ziplock bag in the car for nausea. Make food for your postpartum!” Alaska McFadden
Selecting a doula
"There are many great doulas with lots of experience and certifications, but your doula should feel like a hired temporary best friend who is also a birth professional." Bailey Rollins, Moon Stone Babies
“Interview a handful of doulas, at least 3-4. A doula is meant to be your teacher, confidante, cheerleader, advocate, and friend for you and your support team, so it's important to find someone that makes you feel heard and held. Someone may have all of your on-paper credentials but you just don't get along with them, comfort and connection are key for both parties when deciding to work together.” Alexandra Blanchard, Moon Child Doula
“When selecting your doula, look for a personality match! If you have a sense of humor, hopefully you can share some laughs with your doula in that initial consultation. If you're highly anxious, your ideal doula will likely make you feel safe & seen, even in your interview! These kinds of things are so much more important than number of births, certification, or whether they've given birth themself.” Sarah Grace Sweeney, Golden Bow Birth
“I'm a vibes person. I think who you want as your doula is a very personal decision, and like one of my favorite midwives, Robina Kahlid says, birth is more like sex than a wedding. It's intimate and primal and you need to choose people you feel absolutely safe with. Go with your gut! That's the start of parenting.” Alaska McFadden
Ready to get started on your doula search? Check out our blog post: Questions to ask your NYC doula.
Expecting the unexpected
“I describe pregnancy, birth, and parenthood as beautiful chaos. We have to remember that babies are their own unique individuals with their own goals and preferences. So, in many cases, they are the captain of the ship and we are just along for the ride!” Alexandra Blanchard, Moon Child Doula
“The vast majority of the time things happen slowly in labor. While that isn't always the case, in most circumstances you do have time to ask questions, discuss risk/benefits and speak privately with your partner or birth team about what feels right for your family.
All interventions should be medically necessary or desired. IF you're looking to avoid interventions, your provider choice is the biggest thing that will impact that. Making sure you're in alignment about routine induction and choosing a provider with a low induction rate who is supportive of you going to at least 41 weeks and 6 days past your EDD will statistically reduce the chance of intervention.
When something is happening in the moment I always suggest (and practice!) sending my energy down through the floor or whatever part of my body is closest to the ground. Taking deep breaths with longer exhales than inhales calms your central nervous system, helps you to stay present, and reduces the hormones that speed up and intensify anxiety.” Alaska McFadden
Physically preparing
“Walk 3-4 miles, mindfully and preferably in nature every day in your pregnancy and you will increase your chances of having a faster, smoother birth. There is something magical about the simple act of walking in pregnancy.” Bailey Rollins, Moon Stone Babie
“Anyone who gives birth should meet with a pelvic floor therapist, and starting this before birth could potentially have a huge impact. I love Sonia Reiter's prenatal pushing preparation education or birth smarter's Push Prep. Doing deep squats daily can help and making the Three Balances by Spinning Babies a daily exercise during the 3rd trimester can really help achieve optimal fetal positioning which leads to shorter, easier labors with less back pain.” Alaska McFadden
“Get in touch with your body. Spend pregnancy learning, moving, and nourishing yourself in whatever ways you feel called to. Practice mental and physical coping with your doula/partner so your support team knows what feels good to you and what doesn't. There's no downside to feeling strong, healthy, and confident going into labor and parenthood!” Alexandra Blanchard, Moon Child Doula
“As a prenatal yoga teacher, I am a little bit biased towards the practice of yoga for pregnancy and birth prep, but I just tell all of my clients to remain active in whatever way works and feels best for them! For some it's yoga, but I've had clients who keep their spin routines, rock climb, dance, pilates, walk, weight lift...you name it. Staying very mindful in your connection to your body will pay off in spades when it comes time to labor and give birth. These clients are generally less afraid of the sensations they feel in labor, know intuitively what positions to get into, and have more stamina for pushing.” Sarah Grace Sweeney, Golden Bow Birth
Tips for staying strong when things feel hard, leading up to birth
“Lean on your team, don't force yourself to struggle in a silo. If something feels wrong and it's in your control to fix it, call on your village to help do so!” Alexandra Blanchard, Moon Child Doula
“Seek out support! Find people you can talk to. Prepare yourself for your postpartum by cooking freezer meals, lining up that IBCLC, or getting a meal train going.
Be gentle with yourself. Remind yourself that birth is physiological and all of your ancestors did it. Everyone on earth was born. You can do this too. Birth is arguably the most liminal threshold space in life and it's an enormous challenge to hold space for that, so amp up gentleness and self-care. Listen to your body and require less of yourself as you get closer to birth.” Alaska McFadden
Best food/snack for birth
“Whatever you crave! Typically lean towards nourishing, easily digestible comfort foods such as popsicles, nuts, broth, or favorite fruits and juices. And don't eat anything that would be rough coming back up!” Alexandra Blanchard, Moon Child Doula
“I love squeezable apple sauce and miso packets. They are quick, easy, and don't usually heighten nausea or acid reflux. For post-birth, I always carry an organic apple juice and people love it.” Alaska McFadden
Mentally preparing
“It's normal to have some fear around childbirth especially if you are a first-time parent, but it's important to address your fears and anxieties so that they are not driving your labor car. Put them in the back seat or better yet in the trunk, along for the ride but not navigating your ride.
The best environment for labor and birth is where you feel most comfortable and safe. Setting up the perfect environment for labor and birth is where spa meets date night, a little relaxation and a little sexy goes a long way.” Bailey Rollins, Moon Stone Babies
“I think education is the cornerstone to an empowered birth. Watch births, take childbirth education, listen to podcasts about positive birth experiences. When people share their birth stories or recommendations with you ask yourself if they have/had the same priorities and goals as you do. Educate yourself about birth preferences and ensure early on that you and your provider are in alignment.” Alaska McFadden
“Preparing for birth requires a balance of knowledge and flexibility, grit and softness. It's important to be informed, confident, and firm in the things you can control such as your birth location, your support team, and your goals and boundaries. But practicing the art of surrendering that which you cannot control will be a gift to yourself when navigating labor and newborn life!” Alexandra Blanchard, Moon Child Doula
“When mentally preparing, I, of course, think education is highly valuable (birth classes, reading, podcasts, etc.). On top of this, I always push my clients to go a little deeper. Expecting parents can become a bit overly confident in their birth plan, or "knowing all the data" without having done much inner work to prepare for birth. But birthing is a deeply internal experience, and it will challenge what you believe to be true about yourself, which is why I love journaling, art, mindful movement, meditation, talk therapy, and support groups during the prenatal time. Birthing from Within is one of my favorite resources to start exploring this.” Sarah Grace Sweeney, Golden Bow Birth
Creating birth preferences
“Education can inform experience — if you don't know your options, you don't really have any! Take classes and discuss with your doula the wide array of risks, benefits, policies, and options through the context of what your goals are. Together you can have plans A, B, and C mapped out so you feel informed and prepared. Also, it's ok if your goals and preferences change as your experience unfolds!” Alexandra Blanchard, Moon Child Doula
“This is where a doula can be very helpful because you don't know what you don't know. Whatever you do, don't take childbirth education or build your preferences via your hospital- seek out the expertise of professionals who know the full realm of what is possible and probable at your chosen birth location.” Alaska McFadden
“Creating your birth preferences is a valuable educational exercise, and a way to make sure you, your primary birth partner, and your provider are on the same page. But I strongly encourage my clients not to get too hung up on a piece of paper, or the logistics of *exactly* how their birth will unfold. When we focus too much on checking boxes, we are relying primarily on validation from others and external tools, instead of using our intuition to guide us. Having goals is amazing, and I love helping peoples' dream births come true, but flexibility is key! We want to embody the wisdom that not hitting certain markers on your birth plan does not make you a lesser person or parent.” Sarah Grace Sweeney, Golden Bow Birth
Planning for a relaxing and healing maternity leave
“Assemble your village long before baby arrives. Babies and parents don't really *need* a hundred swings and gadgets and onesies, they truly need nourishment, rest, and tenderness. Also, organize your finances with @jennyleighmayer and @fullyfundedx40weeks!” Alexandra Blanchard, Moon Child Doula
“Get support. There are times in life when we leave community such as adolescence and our twenties, and there are times when we return to it like weddings, funerals, holidays, and birthdays. Birth and postpartum are a time when people find themselves needing support and craving community, so seek that out ahead of time. Reconnect with distant friends for lunch dates, or even just phone calls, attend a parenting support group or body feeding support space like La Leche League prenatally to foster relationships with other expecting families.
Make a list of practical things that need to get done. Who does the grocery shopping? Who cleans the bathroom? Who folds the laundry? Then make a list of any helpers who will be supporting your postpartum and what their skill sets are, and try to link those needs with who can meet them. This will show you where the gaps are. Maybe you do drop off laundry for the first month, hire a postpartum doula, get a meal delivery service or meal train, etc. If you're in a relationship, do not rely on your partner to be the sole support. This is both unrealistic and puts strain on the relationship.” Alaska McFadden
Meet our doulas!
Bailey Rollins
Bailey Rollins is a certified Birth, Postpartum Doula and IBCLC Lactation Consultant based in New York City. Bailey has combined her two passions, education and childbirth and enjoys teaching classes that help parents prepare for better birth experiences and transition into parenthood more confidently and more smoothly postpartum. Some of the classes include Hypnobirthing®, Breastfeeding, Newborn Care, Birth Partner Preparation and Prenatal Yoga.
As an IBCLC International Board Certified Lactation Consultant, Bailey is also very passionate about supporting your unique breastfeeding journey and helping more moms find success in breastfeeding,
You can find her at www.moonstonebabies.com
Sarah-Grace Sweeney
Sarah-Grace Sweeney is a birth & postpartum doula, lactation & feeding specialist, pre & postnatal yoga teacher and is currently pursuing her nursing degree to (hopefully!) become a midwife. She has supported more than 100 families in the NYC area through births in hospitals and at home. Her favorite part of birth work is building community with the people braving modern parenthood with curiosity, humility, and a sense of humor! She believes in using medical technology with wisdom while maintaining a connection to the emotional & spiritual aspects of birth. Whatever you choose, and however your birth unfolds, Sarah-Grace believes you deserve to feel supported, powerful, and loved during this incredible rite of passage.
You can find her at https://goldenbowbirth.com/
Alexandra Blanchard
Alexandra is a Certified Birth Doula and Postpartum Doula as well as a Certified Breastfeeding Counselor. She is originally from the Berkshires in Massachusetts and moved to NYC 11 years ago to study psychology. She has been supporting families as a nanny, doula, and educator ever since!
Find Alexandrea at https://moonchilddoula.com/ and https://www.instagram.com/moonchilddoula/
Alaska McFadden
Alaska is a Hypnobirthing & Carriage House Certified Birth Doula, Postpartum Doula & Postpartum Chef, Birthing Advocacy Certified Childbirth Educator (C-CBE), Certified Lactation Consultant (CBC), and is CPR Certified. She supports all family styles, birth environments, and sensation management preferences.